Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Song for a Crappy Tuesday

It's only you and Tuesday in the Computer Lab.

You don't know this woman. In fact, you barely even noticed her entrance. It wasn't until you heard her banging on the keyboard of a neighboring computer and snorting out steamy breathes of rage that you sensed her.

The lab was silent before, but now you are in the hissing boiler room of her fit.

You half stop your own business, only to click the mouse every few seconds to camouflage your curiosity. The air is heavy. Every clicky clack or ticky tack on the keyboard fills your heart with dread. The gravity of her fury pulls you in, making everything your fault. You are somehow responsible.

Minutes slog past. Finally, with a grim chuckle, she clicks the mouse. The Poison Pica Letter is dispatched.

Tuesday picks up her stuff and stalks out of the room. You should feel relief, but the burrs of her mood have lodged themselves. Not even a parade of kittenpuppybaby videos will lighten your mood.

You know this, but google it anyway.


It's a little early yet, but in Chicago, at the very hint of temperatures above 40º we are wearing shorts, riding bikes and getting drunk in public. (The getting drunk in public part is not just a Summer thing, but no ice on the sidewalks makes us 8% less likely to fall after the Hour of Power Jagerbomb Smackdown at the Cubbie Bear.)

So, for us, it might as well be Summer.

Can I just say how much I love Earth, Wind and Fire? First, what a kick ass name. Second, these guys know how to groove. I can't think of a single song of theirs that doesn't make me happy. Instantly.

They are the soundtrack of trotting off to the beach and returning covered in sweat and suntan lotion. They smell like Finesse and Gee, Your Hair Smells Terrific. They taste like Zero Bars and Astro Pops. Earth Wind and Fire will never let you be cold again.

WELCOME SUMMER! I know you are not quite ready for my love, but I am totally stalking you on Facebook anyway!

September - one of the best songs ever.

And as a Special Bonus, here is the Magnificent Pomplamoose with their version!


joe g said...

dancing granny is my favorite part.

Except for the cereal bowl. I have that cereal bowl.

J Landis said...

I would like to mildly suggest a re-write of an above sentence so that it ends more succinctly:

"So, for us, it might as well be Summer.

Can I just say how much I love Earth?"

Yes. Yes you can.

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